Tonks' Pain
by TheOnlyMarauderette
Summary: When Lupin leaves her for a second time during DH, Tonks has to try to move on. But she soon finds out she can't. Oneshot. Please review.


_**I have wanted to do a Lupin/Tonks fic for a while now. This is the second time Remus has left Tonks. It takes place in the Deathly Hallows. Oneshot. Tonks' POV. I do not own Harry Potter.**_

He was gone. In the space of twenty minutes, her world had fallen apart. It had started off harmlessly, her going into work to inform her boss (who was clearly a Death Eater) that, in a couple of months she would be taking maternity leave. She suspected she would have to go into hiding soon enough anyway. That night she came home bleary-eyed and upset.

As she stumbled in the doorway, her foot caught on the edge of the carpet. She toppled over, but twisted so she would land on her backside.

Remus jumped to his feet straight away to see if everything was ok.

"Are you okay? Is the baby fine? What's wrong?" he asked panicking.

"We're both grand, aren't we little guy?" she said, rubbing her still-flat stomach, but Remus knew better.

"You have to be more careful Dora," Remus insisted. She grumbled, knowing that no matter how hard she tried, no matter how smooth a surface was, that her feet would always find something to trip over.

"Now what's wrong?" he questioned. "Nothing," she answered, determined not to look into his eyes because, if she did, she would tell him everything.

"Dora," Remus said impatiently.

She knew she could not hold out any longer.

"At work, even some of the people I had thought were friends, said horrible things to me after they found out," Tonks sobbed.

Remus sighed and led her to the couch. "What did they say?"

"I won't say," she mumbled. "Anyway, it's their problem not ours."

Remus shook his head. No, it was his problem, he thought savagely. It was all his fault. His wife was being treated like dirt because of him. He knew his unborn child would be treated as such too.

He couldn't do this to them any longer. He had to leave. Immediately.

"I have to go Dora," he said softly.

"No," she said sitting up straight. "Not again," she begged.

"I have to, it's for your own good," was all he said.

"Who are you to decide? Will you leave your child fatherless?" she demanded, drawing herself to full height.

She would kill him if he told her, but when she got angry, which Remus had only seen twice, it was clear that she was descended from the Noble House of Black.

"I'm sorry," he said and began packing.

She argued with him the whole time, but when he reached the door her voice softened.

"Please," she choked out. "Please stay Remus. I love you."

"I love you. That is why I have to leave." He swept from the apartment, not even hearing the broken-hearted sobs that Tonks was emitting.

Her crying lasted for three hours. She remembered her baby and finally stopped. She could not be herself without him. Last time she had felt she was living only half a life, and the half that remained held no happiness.

That's when she got annoyed. He had left her all alone to deal with a new-born baby! She could not imagine having to grow up without her dad, and now her child would have to do exactly that.

The pure cheek of him. Who did he think he was! How dare he! She had loved him, shrugged when he told her about his lycanthropy, told him that she didn't mind, as long as he would stay with her every other day.

Last time was horrible, she thought. He said he would never leave me again! She was so angry, her wand produced fiery red sparks.

The stage of anger lasted two whole weeks. The only reason she was carrying on normally was for her child. She would look after her baby with more love than was thought possible.

She was cleaning some dishes, when a thought suddenly popped up in her head and exploded like a firework. I still love him. After everything, I still can't imagine anyone more perfect, she thought wistfully. She knew he had only done what he thought was right, but that didn't mean she liked it.

She began to pretend she was never angry with him. But something new replaced the anger, something she didn't expect.

Worry. She could not stop worrying. About her dad, her child, the Order and last of all, she could not stop worrying about Remus.

She missed his footsteps clattering through the doorway, signalling his return home. That is why, one day a month later, when she heard that noise she thought she was imagining things. But then she heard a rough voice behind her say "Dora."

She whirled around, shocked and surprised. He was much more handsome than she remembered. She felt life flowing into her fingertips, just seeing him sent her to Cloud Nine.

She was finally whole again. In one look, the jagged hole he had left in her heart was healed.

But she looked closer. His face was unshaven, his clothes dirty. It was clear he had been on the streets.

"Why are you here?" she asked. The question came out more aggressively than she had planned.

"I came to apologise and see if you would take me back," he said looking thoroughly miserable.

She knew she would take him back. She had to have him back. But all the resentment she had felt towards him in the past month and half was boiling inside her.

She walked straight up to him and her body seemed to act by itself for it did two things she had not planned. She smacked him across the face, then pulled him close and kissed him passionately.

"I'm sor-" he began after they broke apart but Tonks just said "I know. I forgive you. I love you."

Through all the things that happened, including war, the death of Tonks' father and the birth of their son, they now knew that nothing could ever separate them again.

Not even death.


End file.
